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I cant believe this...
after all these years
have finally accepted me!
All the repression
and denial about who you truly are
is finally gone!
bursting down the door
and visible to the whole world!
i have finally accepted who i am
and now i want it to be shown to the world.
Through the years
there have been many who have caught my eye
but i just threw those feelings aside
those ever haunting words to myself
"I am straight!"
repressing my true thoughts
to appease those of the "norm"
after years of repression
i tap into these emotions that i have
and discover who i truly am.
i no longer have to hide
this side of me
i no longer have to repress
how i feel
July 3rd, 1863
It was a battle of awesome proportions. Our boys in blue were able to fight off the gray invasion, but at drastic costs. It is from here at the camp that I can see the blood of my comrades...no, that is not accurate. I see the blood of my fellow Americans splashed over the fields of Pennsylvania; once beautiful and green, now stained with the bodies of its children. At first I thought of it as a triumphant over the dogs of rebellion, but that was before I searched the battlefield for supplies. Once it was sure the fight was over we were allowed to head out and scour the dead for supplies. When I went out with my troop I heard a noise. It would appear that I was the only one to hear this noise, because my fellow soldiers did not turn the way I did. It was off in a spinney of trees and sounded like a man in great pain letting out a whisper for help. I looked back to my fellow soldiers and saw that they were going through ruck sacks and ammo pouches; their minds were occupied. I decided t
How could this happen?
I don't understand...
Who used to make me happy. ..
I can't look at them
Without wanting to cry
How could this happen?
How was i so stupid?
How could I let my guard down...
I will not be made a fool of.
This will be
The last time
I promise you
I will never drink
My bitter sorrows away
When I try and help myself feel better
Life goes and...
Makes that knife look really pretty.
Believe In Yourself"Believe In Yourself"
By: Ulrich J S Edelstein
~Life has been barbaric to me in innumerable ways,
But it's also been a learning experience
And I've learned a lot from it.
Just living through the journey of it all.
~May not be as outstanding as I'd like it to be,
But I never know where life is gonna take me.
Could improve, could get more dreadful.
I may never know if I take my life.
~So, I just keep living hoping one day
I'll find ever lasting happiness and full fill dreams that I have.
And to find one person I can devote myself to and love endlessly.
~And be with that one person til the day life decides it's my time to expire.
That's my story.
For myself to you, I have much to articulate.
Please listen to every word of it.
~You have to look past all those attributes that you don't like about yourself.
And your visual image has nothing to do with it.
You'll one day fathom you are exquisite on the inside
And love yourself for being you.
~And it will all make sense to you
And you'll re
A simple crushTick tock, Tick tock,
hands are rushing down the clock
I wait for you ever hopeful
I feel like such a fool
I dream of our future
the kids we'll nurture
the memories we'll make
the stories we'll create
we may not be together
but I'll love you forever
L.E.S.B.I.A.N.Living on the
Edge of life
I truly am
As it is all i can be
Never forget that
Dear GodDear God,
I have some questions.
Why is my love for another man a sin?
What is so unacceptable about true love?
Why did you make me this way?
And don't even say that it's a choice.
I was born this way,
Just accept it.
You apparently made me the way I am.
So why is it so wrong,
To be me?
If I could choose,
I would be straight,
Considering how wrong I seem to be about love.
I would just like to say,
That you're misleading your people.
They have it all wrong.
Take this for instance:
People are being killed,
For something that they can't control.
For being themselves.
For doing something so...
I'm going to burn in Hell,
For not doing anything wrong,
Especially since I was made this way.
They call us faggots,
Say were "possessed by the Devil",
And attack our ways of life.
What did we do wrong?
How will our marriage affect them?
The simple answer is that it won't.
Nothing negative will happen,
If we en
To all homophobesAs they talk, how they think,
they believe, what they say,
only an expression of their nothingness.
Nothingness which they think,
To judge us.
Nothingness which they mean,
To tell us what is right.
To direct as they want,
to what we are not.
Of their void thinking,
they are not self-aware.
Too deep it is in them,
the compulsion to turn
and want to break.
Danger, a foreign word,
they do not fear.
They are safe of being.
They are protected.
The supporters of them,
are blinded of the same thing,
such as those of nothingness.
Are driven by the idea,
To conserve the nothingness.
Yet they all are taken,
from the resentment they draw on themselves,
Souls from which they sought
But they should know,
that the wrongs they do,
will not be tolerated.
My friend is not just a "she".
My friend is She.
With a capital S.
Because She is amazing.
She's one of my best friends.
I laugh with Her.
I dry Her tears.
I sing (loudly and badly) Her.
And I think I might love Her.
What's not to love?
And She's perfect for me.
I wish I could tell Her how I feel.
But I can't.
I'm not even sure if She knows I'm bi.
So I have to settle for writing down my feelings in a crappy Hello Kitty notebook.
(Seriously, the thing cost two bucks.)
Maybe someday I'll show this poem to Her.
Maybe someday I'll tell Her how I feel.
But for now,
this will have to do.
stains you left behindThe ring of tea from the bottom of your mug
Is all that I have left,
Memories of you have gone.
Stains are all that are left.
Permanent reminders to me that,
Every waking hour of my day,
I should have loved you,
Maybe then these stains would have washed away.
I killed something beautiful,
Stripped it naked and left it
In the cold to slowly freeze
Nightmares creep in the day light
And stab me in the back at night,
My screams echo in the moonlight,
All I can do is cry.
Your tea stain on the table,
I sit beside it and weep
With my new best buddy Smirnoff,
He helps me get to sleep.
I finally lost my job,
Now I’m living on the streets.
They said something about alcoholism,
I don’t know what they mean.
I’ve taken up the needle,
Helps me pass the time.
Got some new friends now
But every night I cry until I’m blind.
Just got out of prison,
People say I have no hope left.
I still scream at night, thinking about yo
A Razor's WordsDon't worry little girl
I'm not so far
I'm just beside your cold empty bed
I'm between the papers of your private book inside your dresser
You never forget me
I know you think of me constantly
You know you want me
You always hide me in the dark
And keep me in the silence
Because you don't want nobody to know about me
Or about our bloody secret
You know you want to take me
You hear me calling for you
You like my sound when I fall on the ground like the fine steel I am
You want me to give you pain I know
Just pick me up
I will be gentle, slip softly
And fast, you won't feel the hard pain
You know you want to feel me cutting under each thin layer of your skin
Fill your filthy desire with me
I'm shiny with odd shape
Rusty with rotten blood stains on my edges
Sharp and all you want to comfort your dead soul with
Don't be scared, for all you want is to feel numb
And I can make you feel good and lost
As you are always walking confused in your own dark and cloudy
Not aloneYou are not alone.
Never, ever, forget that.
We all love you
Just the way you are.
Over the last year,
You've been dragged to hell and back,
By the ignorant, the selfish,
But you're still here.
I admire you so much,
You're so willful,
To be honest, if not for you
I probably wouldn't be here myself.
You've been my saving grace so many times,
I honestly don't know what I would've done
Every time that I see you,
You've had another piece of your soul
You're hurting so badly,
And it kills me.
You don't have to do this by yourself.
We all want to help,
To support you,
But, you have to let us in.
You are not alone.
HiddenYou doubt me
cast me to the back of your thoughts
I dont want to be here
i want to be out in the open!
I want to be shared with the world!
because of the others words
you keep me hidden...
and whenever i show my face
trying to show you who you really are
you deny me
And shout those awful words
ever scaring words...
I guess i'll just stay here
waiting in the darkness until you're ready
continue to live the lie
continue to repress me
continue to deny me
I cannot fight it anymore
i cannot stop you
What is going on?
if you need help making it through the dayremember:
The Coffee GodThe Coffee God behind the counter shuffles foot to foot, a dance of steam and espresso. Black painted fingernails, inch gauged ears and a gray striped sweatshirt, hood crooked on his back. There's a cigarette tucked behind one ear; it bobs and twitches with each step.
“Non-fat caramel latte,” he calls, just as he always does, part of a spell, part of a mantra, toneless (just a tuck at the end). I reach. He looks up.
The espresso maker hisses.
There's something like a grin, something like a spark, something like a shared secret linked eye to eye. When he passes over the drink (rough cardboard sleeve hot to the touch), he lingers. Our fingers brush, a shiver, a jolt, a ten-watt shock.
The Coffee God tilts his chin, shouts, “Hey, mind if I take my break now?”
and ducks around the counter without waiting for a reply.
He slips his cigarette between his lips without taking his eyes from mine. I follow him out the door.
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